ACROSS the nation today, hearts will flutter upon romantic notions.
Most readers will know that, deep at heart, farmers and rural producers are some of the most romantic people on the planet.
They might take to most things with confident gusto, be it wrestling cattle or calibrating a header, but finding that special someone can present a pretty high hurdle.
So we slapped an Akubra on Cupid and told him to think beyond the cheesy, inner-city bar-talk when it comes to initiating romantic conversation, and come up with some cheesy, agricultural quips instead.
Here are our top 30 agricultural pick-up lines.
Got a favourite?
1. Don’t worry about the John - just call me dear.
2. Have you been eating 1080 bait because you're drop-dead gorgeous.
3. I usually pull a rotary hoe so let me know if I’m moving too fast.
4. Have you got a licence for those guns?
5. Well shut the gate because my heart just bolted.
6. What’s a stud heifer like you doing in a commercial place like this?
7. I don’t know which horse is the favourite but my heart’s sure racing.
8. There's room under this big hat for two.
9. I’m a stud owner. Would you like to be one too?
10. As an apiarist, I know a sweet flower when I see one.
11. Look, I can't wheat to tell you; you make my heart sorghum.
12. Sure, I grow vegetables, not jewellery, but even I know the more carats the better.
13. I'm a grain producer but I'm sure tired of going silo.
14. I won't tell you what I grow but I'll give you a hint, sweetpotato.
15. I'm looking to turn my greenhouse into more of a green home, if you'll help me.
16. Yep, I'm immunised against Q-fever but there's no vaccination for love.
17. If I'd known I'd be meeting a Miss Showgirl I would have put on my town Akubra.
18. I'm thinking of getting a new cattle brand just now- U4Me.
19. Do you know much about insecticides? Because I've just been bitten by the love bug.
20. We might be in drought but I'm having a flood of emotions right now.
21. As a wool classer I can tell you're superfine.
22. I've also got black boots, you know, just in case a wedding comes up or something.
23. I'm all for sensible firearm laws but I'll be blowed if I know when that Cupid is going to rein things in. He's just shot me.
24. I'm not a climate change denier but when you walked in things just got hot.
25. Would you mind if I tested your Brix level? You seem sweeter than most.
26. Hey honey… oh, sorry. I'm a beekeeper and it's a force of habit. I'll buzz off now.
27. Now you know I'm a veggie grower, can I call you pumpkin?
28. As a mango grower, I'm used to seeing blushed cheeks. Not usually my own, though.
29. I didn't know this was a stonefruit conference but I'm sure glad I found a peach like you.
30. I'm no Jackie Howe but you've got to admit this is shear attraction.
