Knowing when to stop and take a breather

Most of it has been good and I have been very grateful for the opportunities and experiences I've been gifted.

However, recently I've felt quite overwhelmed and sometimes drained.

I usually work well with chaos and thrive under pressure. I get bored easily so I like being busy. If you know me, you know this.

It explains my career, celebrant business and love for community involvement.

This year, though, with everything on my plate and a huge hay season for my ag contracting husband, I decided I would be kind to myself and approach my workplace about reducing my hours to be able to best show up for them and for my family.

I've been with Ross for eight hay seasons and harvests now and we have a six-year-old daughter Ruby, so I am no stranger to solo-parenting and getting things done by myself.

But, I did find it a bit odd this year. I had this inkling inside me. It was telling me to slow down this season.

I'd done it so many times but I am really big on going with my gut so, in agreeance with my work, I went from working five days to four.

It was a good decision, as in that first week my husband made a last-minute decision to buy another big square baler, tractor and caravan, and really went for it. Working in the drought space, I'd been following the season outlook and knew this was a good decision.

Then, while having this extra day off and knowing the massive hours Ross was putting in, two things happened which made me feel like I'd failed. I sent our daughter to school without her lunchbox and then I forgot to organise the tooth fairy's visit.

My first instinct was to be hard on myself, but on the back of a busy year, two months into Ross' peak season and having received a rare diagnosis recently - my reaction was instead, again, out of character.

As my six-year-old stood next to my bed with a confused look on her face, tooth in hand, I messaged my boss to ask if I could take the next two days off as annual leave.

To get to the end of the season and the year, it was clear I needed a mental break.

Then, as fate had it, as I was hanging around home having a breather, Tanya Forster, a mother and farmer's wife based in the Dubbo district, and CEO and psychologist at Macquarie Health Collective, shared a blog post titled The Harvest Hurdle.

The post puts into perspective how tough harvest can be on everyone but also gave simple, but effective, tips on how get through this stressful time of year. The words really resonated with me. You can read them all below.

By Tanya Forster

Harvest has arrived!

For our family, it started this week. I know many others across the region have also started or soon will.

Harvest can be an incredibly tough season for all members of the family. Long days, minimal family time, minimal sleep, and weather we can't control.

This season, I thought I would focus on strategies to support the partners of farmers doing the long hours.

Potentially this means long days home alone, long days caring for children, running a household by yourself, or weeks of barely seeing your partner.

As a farmer's wife, I know how tough these seasons can be. Here are some of the things I am going to do this harvest season to help take care of myself:

Keep it simple. When it comes to meals, routines, chores, etc - I am stripping it right back. There is no gold medal at the end of this. Keeping it simple with key areas like meals and chores will remove additional pressures, that quite frankly, I just will not have time for.

Add water. The days can sometimes be long, and you may not have the other half of your parenting duo around much. Turn the sprinkler on and let them run. Put them in the bath and let them play. Feed them in the bath if you have to. I have done this many times, and it has been the exact circuit breaker we have all needed.

It takes a village. Your village can be whoever you need it to be. This season, I am going to make sure I book in a few coffee dates with my village to help me keep my head above water

Sunshine. A walk in the sunshine and fresh air is a gamechanger for me. You will often see me walking the dirt roads, or doing a quick lap of the block around my office. A mindful reset to keep me going.

Be kind. This is not an easy time. Things will likely feel hard. It is the perfect storm for that threat system to switch on. Self-compassion will be important.

Meditate. I have become a decent fan of the Calm app. I used to cringe a little at the idea of meditation, but I am a complete convert. The research for what it does for our brains neurologically is very convincing. Sneaking in a quick 10 minute meditation to turn on that soothe system? Sounds good to me.

Time out. When the kids go to bed, I am going to put my phone away, and spend time catching up on some of the TV shows, movies and books I enjoy. Cup-filling time, with all the goodies my husband does not appreciate. Netflix here I come..

It's been a tough season, but here's to closing it out as best we can, and then enjoying a relaxing festive season. See you on the other side